Crosses

Felt a bit creative this morning!

Conversation with Hamish

Me: Hamish, can you say 'Mum-ma?' 'Mum-ma?'

Hamish: (thoughtful pause) 'Dad-da!'

"Mess? What mess?"

Hatchlings

This is a photo of some insect eggs on our glass door. Weirdly interesting!

The Good...

Hamish managed to make it through last night without me having to go into him at all. First time ever!! What a spin out - totally wasn't expecting it either. He did wake up a few times but seemed to go back to sleep without any dramas. Woohoo! This is after a week of getting little decent sleep mind you.

I've been reminded that during the tough times, God is refining our character. And I feel like I've been embracing the challenges more this week instead of resenting them. An attitude adjustment does wonders!

I've got today's dinner organised and have run the dishwasher, and done two loads of laundry.

I'm booked in to visit the local health clinic day stay service on Monday, to see if they can help with Hamish's night issues.

...The Bad...

Hamish has had a cold all week, Adam has it now, and I feel one coming on myself.

Hamish is refusing to breastfeed (I think because his nose is blocked) so I have to make like a cow and express milk for every feed. All things considered, this is not too bad but still - makes life a bit more complicated!

We are so unorganised at the moment - it's a bit of a challenge to keep the house stocked with food, and pay bills on time, and other domestic necessities such as these. It's frustrating, but somehow we always seem to scrape by.

We have an outbreak of pantry moths, and fleas (eek!) and I can't seem to get my act together to deal with either. Don't want to admit defeat though, because then they'll all take over!

Even when I get a half decent sleep at the moment, the energy it affords me only lasts half a day and then I feel exhausted again. Me thinks the sleep debt is at fault here.

...And The Ugly!

Yesterday, there was a knock at the door. I opened it to see a burly council officer, who said:

"A complaint has been lodged against your cats!"

I said:

"The cats?!?"

I would have thought any complaint would be about the dogs barking and terrorising locals passing by our fence, but no - apparently one of the cats has killed a neighbour's guinea pig.

As we discussed this horrendous crime, Oscar sunned himself on the porch, looking every inch a relaxed moggie who wouldn't hurt a fly. It was a wonderful performance.

The council man asked us to put bells on the cats, and to register them with the council. There's nothing in the legislation that allows them to charge us with an offence for a cat attack, so technically the cats get off scot-free.

Poor guinea pig though :(

Trees

This is a lovely post from Lionel Windsor over at the Sola Panel...

This Week

Well we've reverted to the 3 hrs max sleep at a time overnight the last few nights - we're all zonked again! We're booked in Monday week to the local health clinic day stay service, to see if they can help at all.

It's a frustrating situation because one the one hand I know what we need to do, but on the other, I'm too tired! Hamish has started crying in a way that is more of a protest than straight distress, and once he's on a roll it's very hard to calm him down.

Apparently things do sometimes get worse before they get better so fingers crossed we'll all be getting more sleep soon.

He started at family day care yesterday - it went well and he seemed to cope fine. We went there the day before to familiarise him with it all, and he did his first finger painting! Tried to eat the paint too, naturally.

Here's a few photos I took this week:

Oscar ready for his next outing. He slept in the stroller a few nights this week - it is now a lot hairier than it was before.


Modelling PJs very kindly given to us by a friend, along with many other clothes her boy has grown out of.

There's that tongue again!





Oscar enjoying the sunshine.

Top Day

I had a great day today. It started with only having to get up twice overnight, and getting almost 6 hrs sleep in a row (compared to a maximum of 2 hrs 15 mins last week).

We went to Terrigal for breakfast, something we haven't attempted in months, and it was lovely - we ate at a cafe right near the beach - good coffee, good food, great view. Then we dropping in on Terrigal markets to visit our sister-in-law Nicole, who has a stall there selling very cute baby stuff. We also picked up some pastries that were delicious. I gave Hamish a piggyback ride to the car and he had a great time dribbling on my head.

Then back home to lunch, did a bit of gardening, read the Herald, and relaxed.

And to top it all off, Hamish went to sleep incredibly easily tonight - took about 10 minutes compared to 45 mins last night - dramatic improvement!

I still have a major sleep debt to pay off, but hopefully now I'll have a fighting chance of actually making it happen.

Girltalk series

The Girltalk blog are doing a series on The Gospel for Busy Moms. I'll be reading with interest....

Progress

So, I have been very tired this week. The phrase that came to mind yesterday was 'bitterly tired'. lol I wasn't in a very good mood at the time!

But, after talking with the local community health nurse and a tresillian nurse, and having had an afternoon nap, I tried a new settling technique last night for Hamish and it worked - he slept much better. I only had to get up twice (as opposed to the 3 or 4 times we've been used to lately). And he was a lot more settled throughout the evening instead of constantly waking and crying out, so I was more relaxed and positive after a few hours of quiet.

It's amazing the difference it makes getting 4 hrs solid sleep compared to 3 hrs. Of course, because I was used to being up so often, I spent half the night awake wondering when I'd next have to get up!

The only thing I did differently to bring on this change of behaviour was to start teaching Hamish to go back to sleep without being picked up first. It was actually relatively easy - although it did take an hour at first for him to cooperate - I would leave him for a few minutes and he'd scream the house down, but when I went back in (after say 3 minutes) he'd end up smiling after not too long so I knew he wasn't really too distressed. I left him alone for good when he was lying there blowing the world's biggest raspberries at me.

I still fed him twice overnight, because he's used to it, but it was longer in between feeds than normal so I felt it was a step in the right direction.

Let's see if he can do it again tonight.....

Child's Play

The Girltalk blog posted about an article by Heather Koerner this week. It struck a chord with me, particularly this:

I'm not sure when it hit me.

Maybe it was the morning I sat watching my 3-month-old daughter sleep next to me on the living room floor as I folded what seemed like the third laundry load of burp cloths that day. There was a lot about the moment that I had expected — love in my eyes, wonder in my heart. But there was also a lot I hadn't expected — a house that had once been orderly and clean that was now stacked high with piles of laundry, dirty dishes, baby paraphernalia and one exhausted, not very attractive looking mommy.

I remember thinking, This is so hard. I'm not sure I can do this.

And I remember being overwhelmingly frustrated. For crying out loud (which, I think I was at that moment), I have a graduate degree. I've taught trigonometry. I've met deadlines, edited copy and run conferences. Why in the world can't I handle one tiny baby and a 1,200 square foot house?

It's a really easy trap to fall into, and I've certainly done it - assumed managing a baby and house is child's play compared to having a career and a 'real job'. But this couldn't be further from the truth!

Going Through It

One of the books I've been reading to Hamish is called "We're Going on a Bear Hunt" (by Michael Rosen and Helen Oxenbury). This is how it starts:

We're going on a bear hunt.
We're going to catch a big one.
What a beautiful day!
We're not scared.

Uh-uh! Grass!
Long wavy grass.
We can't go over it.
We can't go under it.
Oh no! We've got to go through it!

And off they go through the grass (and various other obstacles) till they reach the bear - who they run away from!

Dealing with prolonged sleep deprivation caused by a restless baby is a bit like this - the only way, in the end, is to go through it. There's only so much you can do to influence someone else's sleep patterns. And trust me, I've tried everything!

I've had this section of the bible floating round my head this week:

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. (Romans 5:1 - 5)

I'm pretty sure Paul didn't have rough nights with a baby in mind when he wrote this, but I do think I am developing perseverance as I go through this challenging time. The next step is character - I assume he means Godly character - so that's what I'm trying to focus on. It's a great comfort to know that God is at work in me, even when I can't finish a thought or remember what day of the week it is!

God in the tiredness

I've been really tired this week. Not just a little sleepy - more in the needing matchsticks to keep my eyes open and forgetting my name category. And along with the tiredness came stress, depression and anger - a natural reaction to being woken every two hours overnight all week. But not a fun way to get through the day.

I had one particular gloomy day, when God came to the rescue - not with sleep, but with a good conversation with an old friend, an encouraging phone call from a lady at church, who reminded me to lean on God's word, and Adam's parents - who turned up with a 5kg box of chocolates! I ended the day in a much better mood than I started...and looking back I do think it was God that made the difference.

Helping me put out the washing...

...or, as Hamish likes to call it, 'eating dirt'!