Other things

Other things I want to say about giving birth are:

It's a natural physical event - however it has been hijacked by the medical profession to the point where normal births are unnecessarily medically managed.

In normal circumstances, your body is capable of doing it without medical intervention (however if there is a medical problem then bring on the intervention - it's a blessing to have medical help at these times!!)

The body produces its own drugs to counteract the pain - overuse of synthetic pain relief can mess with the body's natural processes and so interfere with the progression of labour.

The environment and situation in which a woman gives birth has a big impact on how the labour progresses, for good or for ill.

Physical recovery after birth

There are lots of things I want to write about giving birth, but I think if I try to do it all at once it will be a bit much! So here's one thing I wanted to say - I was surprised by how physically exhausted I was afterwards.

Of course I expected to be really tired, but for days afterwards the most I could manage without feeling like I had to sit down was a few minutes on my feet. The day we left hospital I pottered around the room packing up for maybe half an hour, and that was the most activity I'd had the whole time I was there (4 days). Any time I did anything on my feet I would feel very shaky very quickly.

It was sort of like how you feel when you've done more exercise than normal and you can't be bothered getting up off the lounge afterwards - you don't have the energy to move. I felt like that for quite a few days straight. I was tottering around, and for the first little while needed help to move much at all - I had no strength in my back or stomach muscles so manouvering myself around was a challenge.

I think the exhaustion was partly a result of the hormonal changes that happen after birth, and the huge physical adjustment to not being pregnant anymore - coupled with the lack of sleep!

Labour is a fundamentally, brutally physical thing. It's one of the most extreme things our bodies are capable of - in hindsight it's no wonder I was so wiped out! I'm glad to have had the experience, it was the most full on thing I think I've ever done. Our bodies are pretty amazing.

Look what Saffy found last night...

Side effects

Think of something you really like doing. Really, really like doing. Your favourite experience ever. Eating chocolate, watching tv, shopping, whatever. Now imagine you can do this thing all the time - sounds great, doesn't it!

Imagine you're doing this thing for a few hours, and while you're enjoying it, you decide it would be nice to stop for a rest. You try to stop for a breather but find you are unable to - you have to keep on doing it for a while longer. You're still enjoying it, but gee, it would be nice to be able to do something else as well.

Then imagine you start getting really tired, and really need to sit down. You manage 5 minutes, and then have to start it again. This goes on and on all day until you're ready to collapse, and perhaps beyond that point, and then you finally get a bit of a break and fall asleep. After what feels like only a few minutes, you have to start again. You've had enough sleep to manage another few hours of it, then you feel like collapsing again. It's like being on a never ending treadmill session at the gym. At the same time you're trying to maintain your every day life.

After a few days and weeks of this, you struggle to remember what you enjoyed about this thing. You know you love it, but you can't seem to find the fun in it any more. Everyone tells you how lucky you are and how great this thing is, and you agree on an intellectual level, but you've got to dig pretty deep to find the feelings to match.


I don't feel like this all the time, but I do sometimes. Lack of sleep certainly brings out lots of negative emotions in me, and I struggle with the unpredictability of it - I never know at this stage how much sleep I might get (or not get!)

But I wouldn't swap it for anything. The solution is to trust God, take it a day at a time, and rest when I can. And to enjoy the good bits, of which there are more every day. I know I'm blessed - it just comes with some serious side effects.

...but it has its moments

Following on from the last post, I should say that there have been some cute moments - Hamish has started to 'talk' to us more - he makes little 'ooh' noises which are sooo cute. And he smiled at Adam yesterday which was adorable.

We gave him a bath last night and he managed to get a bit of the bath water in his mouth - nothing serious but it meant he was blowing little bubbles for a few minutes! I don't think he liked the taste of it somehow...

It's not like a Huggies Ad...

Hamish has been an outside baby for 4 weeks now, and it's been a busy time! Here's some thoughts on the experience...not particularly organised but I wanted to jot them down.

It's a common thought that although new mums are sleep deprived and going through a major life adjustment, the fact that they have a cute baby makes it all worthwhile. I guess this is true on one level, but going without sleep for a long time tends to block out any cutesy feelings I might have. I think it's survival instinct - your body tells you it needs sleep and blocks other stuff out to force you to rest. At best, I have had 5 hrs sleep at a time, more often 2 or 3 hours. At worst, I have fallen asleep sitting up in a chair whilst breastfeeding, and stayed asleep for over an hour!

The most helpful comments I've heard from more experienced mums are along the lines of "it was just really hard work and I didn't really enjoy it at all to start with" and "it isn't like the Huggies commercials!". Also helpful was "don't ask me for advice, I don't think I was very good at it!" and "I felt like I was living with a ticking time bomb for the first four weeks". Someone else told me they really don't like newborns - a very honest remark and perhaps hard to understand until you've had to look after one.

Everyone seems to agree that it does get better. I have found myself wondering why God made it so hard to look after a newborn but He's got the big picture, not me, so I'm sure there's a reason.

While on one level I am usually very tired and stressed at the moment, and it's certainly one of the hardest things I've been through, on another level I am deeply satisfied and content. So it's all ok, but I don't like looking at it as "one thing is great so the other thing is worthwhile". I prefer to see them as separate experiences - one really really hard, one really really special.

Sleeping delivery

Nan told me was that when she was having her children, back in the 40's and 50's, the doctors would knock you out with chloroform at the point of delivering the babies, so the mum wasn't actually awake when the babies were born. I had read of this happening and so it was interesting to hear about it first hand.

What a strange practice - I'm not sure of the logic behind it but it seems really silly and a bit sad to me.

Winter story

We visited Adam's grandparents earlier this week. They live out in the country and have done so their whole lives. They have lots of really interesting stories to tell and we love hearing about what life used to be like. Here's a little one:

Pop remembers one particularly cold winter. It was so bitterly cold that little birds who landed on the wire fence near their place would freeze to the fence and be unable to fly away. They would turn into little iceblocks.

Pop would collect the frozen birds and take them inside. He'd put them in a box in front of the fire, and the birds would thaw out, spring back to life, and fly away.

My Top 5 Ways to Wake a Baby

1. Make a cup of tea you've been looking forward to for some time.

2. Start eating dinner.

3. Make a phone call.

4. Lie down.

5. Start blogging.

Works every time!

It was my intention...

...to blog about something or other today, but I'm too tired! Maybe I'll have more luck tomorrow.

Lyrics?

Does anyone know the rest of these lyrics? It's a song we used to sing in sunday school. I think I'm only missing one word, which could be 'growing' but I'm not sure:

I am the way, the truth and the life
That's what Jesus said.
I am the way, the truth and the life
That's what Jesus said.

Without the way, there is no going,
Without the truth, there is no knowing,
Without the life, there is no SOMETHING

I am the way, the truth and the life
That's what Jesus said.

Oscar gets ready for an outing

I swear it's his current goal in life to sit on everything that Hamish is going to use. Such an opportunist - leave something around, he'll be in it before you can say "Holy cat grime Batman!"

A lot of chair for a little man

On a more positive note

We sold our 4WD yesterday and Adam is today collecting a replacement car, which is a Nissan Stagea - basically like a skyline but a station wagon. We're going to sell the skyline as well so this car replaces both it and the 4WD.

Some days...

...you shouldn't get out of bed! Here's 3 reasons why today qualifies for this status:

• Hamish has thrown up on me twice. Once was at 5am - nice.
• One of the dogs dug up a cat poo in the front yard - and ate it - nice.
• And this really tops it off - a council ranger phoned this morning to check if we still own the dog we got from the RSPCA and said that as we haven't yet registered her with council we will be fined $165 - REALLY NICE!

I knew we should have registered her (and all the others) so it's totally our own fault, but I guess I assumed it was one of those rules no-one bothers enforcing. Clearly I was wrong!

Doggy Doo

This morning Adam caught Saffy with a wet nappy in her mouth - she'd stolen it out of the bin! She reluctantly gave it up.

The dogs are pretty good with Hamish - the most they could be accused of is over-enthusiasm. He's had plenty of licks and they love smelling him. Luckily Saffy knows she is not the boss so she backs off when we tell her to. Ruby is not as excited as Saffy is but likes to have a good sniff.

Today I...

...have fed Hamish probably around 5 or 6 times (in 6 hours)
...have changed maybe 4 nappies
...washed a load of nappies - got it on the line at 3pm!
...had a 45min nap
...went to Medicare to register for the baby bonus and family tax benefit
...made an appt with the community health care nurse who will visit us tomorrow to check on Hamish
and
...that's all so far! Only got to sleep at around 3am last night so feeling quite worn out, but the day is going smoothly enough so that's ok. Tonight James and Nicole are dropping round, and I'm going to watch the new show "Hollowmen".